Something
by soundcheck123
Summary: "What are you gonna do in the mean time?" "Oh, I'm sure I'll think of something" A little moment during Beckett's suspension. Lots of fluff and sexual innuendo, because isn't that what Castle is all about? Two-shot.
1. Something

"Rick?"

She tugged on his arm. Once, twice. Nothing.

He felt her body shifting next to his.

"Are you up?"

He managed to grunt, which she took as a 'yes'.

"I have an idea" She whispered into his ear in a sexy voice, with a tiny hint of excitement, while her fingers traced the contours of his chest.

"Does it involve a hot cup of coffee?" He asked, slightly more awake, but eyes still closed.

"If you want to, yes... but you'll burn places you don't want to get burnt. Trust me."

He popped his eyes open , looking shocked.

"Good God, woman, the things that go through your mind..." He shook his head jokingly, in fake disbelief, which made her laugh.

Kate changed position once again, leaving her side of the bed and moving so that she was lying on top of him, tangling their legs and blocking his view from anything inside the bedroom but her. Not that it bothered him. He never got tired of looking at her and he had already memorized every minor detail in her bedroom, anyway.

Yes, they had been spending most of their time at her place, mainly due to privacy issues. After the unfortunate encounter with his mother on that fateful morning, their very first morning together, they sort of decided that her apartment was more suitable for what they had in mind. Alexis was gone most of the time now and his mother was perfectly fine being left to her own devices.

Martha did wonder, though, from time to time, where on earth her son was off to, after all, a man can't possibly have that many poker nights and meetings with his publisher. Especially when his poker buddies and the publisher herself left him voice mails at home when he was supposedly with them. It took her longer than she was willing to admit to figure it out, but he never looked happy after a meeting with Gina; even when he won at poker, he didn't come home whistling. No, definitely not: there was only one thing, or rather one _person_, that could make him feel this happy. She smiled knowingly every time he turned around to leave the loft and told her not to wait up.

Of course, right now, Rick was staring at the source of his happiness, completely unaware of the fact that their secret relationship wasn't that much of a secret anymore. He loved the privacy her place offered; they might as well be the last two people alive on earth. To be entirely honest, he loved the fact that she was letting him in. No, not like _that_. You perverted people...

Okay, maybe like that _too_, but what he meant was he loved having free access to every part of her life. She had told him about a wall she built around herself after her mom died - right now, it was as if that wall had come down. He could roam around the place, he finally found out why she smelled like cherries (for the record, it was her shampoo), he knew her morning habits, her favorite side of the bed (if you really are keeping record, it was the left side); hell, he had even seen her old high school yearbook. If that's not intimacy, then what is?

He was distracted from his thoughts when she started kissing his jaw line, moving dangerously closer to his earlobe. He knew what her next move was, he tried to prepare for it, but... And there it was, that cheeky and sexy and adorable bite. He shivered and wondered if she was able to tell - the doubt vanished when he heard her chuckle against his ear. Sometimes, he had a hard time deciding if she was an angel or the devil.

"You'll be the death of me, Kate Beckett"

"Come on, I'm sure you'll like it" She nearly purred, placing soft kisses at the corners of his mouth. He had to muster every ounce of self control he had.

"Woman, you've rendered me _weak_. I need coffee, I need food!" He grabbed her shoulders in a vain attempt to express the urgency of his request.

"It's 2 a.m.!"

"So, is there a law that forbids me to eat at 2 a.m.?" She shot him a glare and he noticed he might be in danger. "Please?"

She ignored his plead and proceeded to kiss him; he responded, like she knew he would. His hands travelled away from her shoulders, down her spine, getting closer and closer to her backside. After what may have been five minutes, she broke off, gasping for air.

"You know, you say you're tired... But you don't feel tired to me" she said in an amused tone, panting, referring to the funny things going on down below.

"You're on top of me, kissing me, _naked_" He said matter-of-factly.

"Yeah, so?" She raised an eyebrow, more amused than ever.

"I said I was tired, I never said I was dead!"

She laughed while reluctantly crawling away from him.

"Hey, wait, where are you going?" He seemed upset. Was she playing hot-and-cold? Was that her idea?

"I... am going to feed you" She announced while looking for something in the closet.

"You are?" He sounded like a kid on Christmas morning, his eyes sparkling. He knew Kate well enough to know that this was her being sweet and caring. And she was doing it for him.

"I am" She said, grabbing a robe and putting it on.

"Why...?" His voice trailed off, pointing at the piece of clothing. It was like the kid woke up on Christmas morning to find out there were no presents under the tree.

"We're going to the kitchen" She said, as if it were obvious. "You've seen and done plenty to my naked self, Castle. Plus, I thought you were tired" She teased, trying to sound upset but failing miserably to cover up how entertained she was by the whole situation.

"Still, it doesn't mean I don't want to... enjoy the view" He had a sexy yet playful look upon his face that was oh-so-Castle, which made her go weak in the knees. She tried to recompose herself, but she just couldn't do it quickly enough.

_Bingo_, he thought to himself, smirking.

"Yeah, well... Consider this punishment. For being such a diva" She retorted, incapable of hiding the crack in her voice. His smile grew wider.

She walked all the way over to the bed just to punch him playfully in the arm.

"Come on, old man"

"Ouch!" He exclaimed, more because of the comment than because of the punch.

She headed to the kitchen while he was still getting out of bed. Looking for his boxers and t-shirt on the floor, he shouted into the corridor:

"Just so you know, you don't get to see my sexy figure parade around your living room, either!"

He could hear her laugh coming from the kitchen. When he finally joined her, the smell of coffee was already in the air.

"What have we got here?"

"A very wide selection ranging from pancakes to... pancakes"

"I guess I'll have the, hm... pancakes, then"

He sat by the counter, just watching her. She peeked from the corners of her eyes. If it had been a few months ago and they were at the precinct, she'd tell him flat out to stop. But it was different now; their relationship had changed. He didn't have to hide his admiration and she didn't have to pretend it bothered her anymore. He got up and walked over to where she was standing.

"Let me help you" He nudged her playfully in the ribs.

"No" She took a step to the side to avoid the tip of his finger, chuckling at the whole situation nonetheless.

"I can totally do this! I raised a kid, you know"

"Yes, I do, I've met her, actually" She retorted sarcastically.

"So, let me help you" He insisted.

"I'm trying to do something nice, will you let me?" She pleaded. Turning her head to face him, she chuckled at his pout. "Okay, if you really want to help, you can set the table."

He kissed her excitedly on the cheek and proceeded to grab mugs and plates. Within ten minutes, they were sitting at the table, talking gibberish. She was still amazed at how easy and natural it felt. Of course, it wouldn't always be like this. Somewhere in the back of her mind, her annoying conscience kept poking her happy bubble, trying to burst it. She worried about how Alexis would react to this. Sure, her father was happy, but Kate had put him in danger so many times already... Would you want your dad to date someone like that? What about his mother?

And now that she had decided to go back to work, how would things be at the precinct? If Castle couldn't hold out on PDA, she feared it would affect her image as a cop. It took years for her to earn respect as a detective and she wasn't about to throw it out the window.

But these seemed like very small things compared to the sheer bliss she experienced right now. When it was just the two of them, when all those other people didn't disturb their balance, they were just perfect. And she was willing to handle whatever came their way to make this work. Relationships are always tricky, it's a fact of life, but for the first time in her life, she was dating a man she loved with all of her heart. She hadn't told him yet, but she would, eventually. They had time.

"Everything alright?" he frowned, slightly concerned by her silence.

"Yes, fine" The warm smile that followed was more than enough to make any worries go away. She reached out from across the table, taking his hand. He looked down at the gesture, half-shocked and half-pleased; he still hadn't gotten used to Kate being sweet. "I was just wondering..." He raised his eyes, turning his attention back to her face. "Do you want some more coffee?" She asked, trying to sound indifferent, but a playful spark could be seen dancing in her eyes.

"No, I'm good" He answered, a hint of suspicion in his voice.

"Are you still tired?" She asked, raising an eyebrow and cocking her head to the side slightly.

"No, not at all" As he said it, he felt her foot sliding up his leg. Was he really that predictable? "So I'm guessing this whole 'I'm-being-nice-and-cooking-for-you' thing wasn't a selfless deed, after all?"

A grin spread slowly across her face.

"Smart boy"

She bent over slightly so her head was closer to his.

"Pick one: Nutella or whipped cream?"

His initially shocked expression was quickly replaced by a mischievous one.

"How about both?"

"Good choice." Heading towards the kitchen, she added: "I'll meet you in the bedroom."

He got up so quickly he nearly knocked down the chair. Making his way to the bedroom, he decided maybe he'd give his friend, the mayor, a call tomorrow and see about extending Kate's suspension. Just a couple more days.

**XXX**

_Thoughts? This was intended to be a one-shot, but I kept having more and more ideas while writing... So a second chapter might be coming soon, but I'm not making any promises!_


	2. Something else

_" (...) for the first time in her life, she was dating a man she loved with all of her heart. She hadn't told him yet, but she would, eventually. They had time."_

**XXX**

Kate knocked on the door, unable to ignore how familiar the situation felt. Apart from the dry clothes, everything else was there: she hurt him, he was upset, she had to apologize, she loved him and still hadn't told him. Oh, they were also dating now - or at least she hoped they still were.

It was all so stupid. Really. Rumors had been going around the precinct that the two of them had finally gotten together. At first, they kept trying to remember if they had let anything slide - a kiss on the elevator, showing up almost at the same time - but nothing seemed to stand out. On the way to his house, she figured something much more subtle had given it away; they were, after all, boyfriend and girlfriend now, and they did work in a room full of detectives. It must have been a warmer smile, or a knowing exchange of looks. It didn't matter anymore. To be entirely honest, the Captain's reaction was the least of Beckett's concerns at the moment.

She replayed the dreadful scene in her head for the millionth time. A female officer approached her in the break room - was it true?, she wanted to know. Kate tried to act dumb, but had no luck.

"You know, I thought those were only rumors, but then last week I saw him getting off a cab about two blocks away from here - and you were in it, too. Trying to hide something, detective?" And she giggled. _Giggled._ Kate would've thrown up if she wasn't on the verge of a heart attack.

She didn't manage to come up with an explanation fast enough and her colleague kept staring at her, so she just blurted something out - something incredibly stupid.

"Oh, you know... It's nothing serious." And she forced a giggle, trying to keep the conversation as light and girly as possible.

"Oh." The officer seemed surprised. Kate went back to the dumb act, more convincingly this time. "I just thought..." She trailed off, her eyes wandering to the spot just over Kate's shoulder. "You know what? I should go. We'll talk later!"

She looked flushed, like she was in a hurry all of a sudden. Beckett nodded, barely managing to say an "okay" before the woman left. Turning around, she understood the reaction: Castle was standing there. Of course he would be standing there, isn't there a law about it? Murphy, they call it?

At first she acted normal, offering him a warm smile. The look on his face didn't match hers - in fact, it was precisely the opposite.

"Castle, is something wrong?"

"You tell me." His voice was so cold she could almost feel the atmosphere in the room freeze a little.

"Castle, I was just throwing her off. You know rumors have been going around and..." She stated matter-of-factly, but he interrupted her.

"Yeah, sure." He hadn't believed her, even a kid could see that, and she was a trained NYPD detective. "Listen, I have a, erm... meeting, so I should go. You guys can handle this one without me, right?" He left without even giving her a chance to say goodbye.

He thought she meant it. She almost died and the first thing she did was run to his door, but he was second-guessing her feelings. And she hated herself for it. Was that all she could do, hurt him? After four years, hadn't she learned her lesson?

The self-loathing had to be put on hold when he opened the door. She almost expected him to ask 'what do you want, Beckett?', but, instead, he said nothing, the hurt look upon his face saying more than he ever could. She felt her heart shrinking down to the size of a raisin.

"Can I come in?" her voice wasn't as firm as she wished.

"Do you even want to? Really? You could walk away right now, you know. It would be easier for you." He snapped at her.

"Rick, what are you talking about?"

"Just saying, the least I deserve is a little honesty."

"I have been nothing but honest with you!" She exclaimed, a little surprised by her inability to keep it together and already feeling guilty about what she had just said: it was a lie. She _wasn't _being totally honest with him. But he had misunderstood it completely, it was written all over his face.

"Do you want to know what I think happened, Beckett? I think you _did_ come here that night on a 'spur-of-the-moment' thing, and now you're starting to regret it."

_No, no, no!_, she was filled with desperation, shaking her head vigorously and forcing her way into his apartment. She opened her mouth to say something, but he didn't give her enough time to get the words out.

"You don't want to go public, we can't tell anyone, we can't go out on a real date... And lately you've been pushing me away!" He breathed heavily. "And I have to hear the confirmation of this behind my back?"

Castle's head was pounding; he was even having trouble focusing his eyesight at the moment, unable to meet her gaze. After four years of waiting, they were done in just a little over a month. What hurt the most was he didn't expect this; not from her. He had gone through holding baby Alexis in his arms while Meredith, who had just got back from a trip, said 'she wasn't feeling up for it anymore'.

"Up for what, Meredith? Marriage? A child?"

She nodded casually, while reapplying her makeup.

And then there was Gina, who started treating him like an employee, rather than a husband. When he said he wanted a divorce, her reaction wasn't crying or promising she would try to make it work. She said 'this better not be his latest trick to stall finishing the next novel'.

And now Kate. But it was different, it hurt so much more this time, because it felt more real than ever before; she was so much more real than Meredith and Gina put together. He waited for four years, knowing she was still mourning, knowing she was damaged. He tried to help her through all of this as best as he could and it had worked. She finally had some closure on her mother's case; she was finally whole again. He thought that meant they could finally be together. However, women, he should know by now, had a way of hurting him, and Beckett was still one of them. His train of thought was interrupted when she raised her voice.

"... After the last few weeks, after everything that happened? How could you say that?"

"Sometimes you don't even acknowledge I'm in the room." He shrugged, feeling tired. He didn't want to have this discussion; he just wanted her to leave.

"Because we can't let anyone at the precinct know, Rick! Gates would kick you out in a heartbeat, we've talked about this!"

"Fine, then why doesn't your dad know about any of this? Why can't Alexis and my mother know?" He stated like a lawyer at a court room, building his defense. "Face it, you got into a mess, regretted it and now you're just looking for a clean way out. Here it is. Say the word and I'll be out of your way."

Her eyes started filling with tears and she hated looking so weak and vulnerable, but somewhere in the back of her mind, she knew he was the only person she would ever allow to see her in this state. And he was slipping through her fingers, and she was letting it happen. The words came out in a sort of loud whisper, her voice trembling, hoarse; it wasn't pretty, it wasn't supposed be said during an argument, it should've been special; but it was how she felt and she had to say it before it was too late. She was running out of time.

"But I love you."

Castle, who was in the process of turning around to open the door again, stopped in his tracks. Had she just...? His brain went into overdrive, considering every possibility as to why she would say that if she was looking for a way out. Even if she was doing her best to break up with him without hurting his feelings (which was the best case scenario in his mind up until now), she had no reason to say such a thing.

Unless, of course, it was just the truth.

He raised his head and intended to say something, but she was encouraged by the fact that he hadn't kicked her out the door yet.

"I know I've been acting weird, but this is all so new, I don't know what to do about you at work, because I just want to be with you and you make working so much more fun, I can't imagine you not being there anymore..." She paused to inhale quickly and he thought maybe this was his chance, but she kept on going. "And these past few weeks, when it was just _us_..." She trailed off, failing to find words to describe it. "I didn't want to let anyone else in on this, because then it won't be 'just us' anymore. It'll be family dinners, friends getting together, people asking questions... But don't think I don't want to share all that with you, I do, I really do!" Her voice was strangely high-pitched; she hadn't even realized she was feeling all of this until the words rushed out of her mouth, faster than her own thoughts. "But I... I just wanted it to be just the two of us for a little while longer."

She took a deep breath and he waited another second to make sure she was done. She looked down, too scared to look him in the eye: this whole 'wearing-your-heart-on-your-sleeve' thing was too hard.

He approached her, took her chin in between his fingers and raised her head, so she was able to face him. He could see a mix of fear and hope, but once she noticed he was his normal self again, looking at her like he always did, a small smile crept up on her face.

"Are you... serious?"

She chuckled at his ironic choice of words, wiping away the tears that finally found a way down her cheeks.

"Yes, I'm serious."

**XXX**

They sat on the couch, eating Chinese takeout. The TV was on, but neither of them paid any attention to it, absorbed in a conversation about the case they were working on. If anyone walked in, they'd never be able to tell a fight had just been going on - or that they had just taken a major step in their relationship. Perhaps it was somewhat noticeable during an exchange of looks that was supposed to be quick, but they held each other's gaze, not saying anything but sharing the exact memory of those four little words. Whatever was left of Beckett's wall had come down tonight; Castle now had full access to all-things-Kate. And she didn't feel uncomfortable, she didn't regret it: she was just happy.

She got up to take the dirty dishes to the kitchen and he followed.

"Castle, I was wondering..." She said while placing the dishes in the sink. "Would you like to maybe go on a date with me? You know, when we close this case."

A playful spark went through her eyes, but she was also blushing, making a superhuman effort to control the stubborn smile that insisted on spreading across her face.

"You mean in a public place?"

She nodded.

"What about Gates?"

"I'm pretty sure you just cracked this case, maybe she'll warm up to you."

He approached her, putting his hands on her hips.

"We might end up on Page Six, you know. And you can't shoot the paparazzi."

"Not even a warning shot?" She faked being disappointed, resting her hands on his chest.

"Nope."

"It's okay, I wasn't planning on taking my gun. Besides, we're gonna have to deal with that sooner or later, aren't we?"

He smirked. If this were poker, she'd be all in; and on second thought, so would he. The only inconsistency in his metaphor was that they were both winning the game.

"Okay, but there's something you should know." He sighed, acting serious.

She raised her eyebrows inquiringly.

"I don't put out on first dates."

She laughed, throwing her head back.

"Fine, I can handle it." Her expression changed from amused to lustful. "It will be such a waste, though..." Her hands travelled down his abdomen, finding his belt buckle. "Do you thing you can put out now?"

He flinched at her touch, making her chuckle.

"Y-yes," He stammered "I believe that can be arranged."

**XXX**

_Did I get too serious on you? I re-read this fic yesterday and that sentence just jumped at me, I couldn't help myself. And I know Castle seems a bit emasculated here, but he's usually portrayed as such a ladies man I actually quite like seeing him this way._

_One more thing: I really hate authors who beg for reviews, but, then again, I'm a hypocrite, so... Reviews, please? Compliments and constructive criticism are greatly appreciated!_


End file.
